Friday, July 15, 2011

The complexities of masculinity and going gluten free.

Hi blog, it's been a while....Megan's commitment to the blogosphere has inspired me again...that and the voices in my head. 
So I've got a legitimate question for everyone...do girls still want boys to open the door for them? To stand up when they leave the table?  Should boys be so comfortable playing Barbies and growing up to enjoy a nice pedicure...not that those are necessarily linked, but...
I'm just confused about the new masculinity, how to raise boys to be boys in an era where gender lines aren't so clear cut anymore.  Understand, I'm not bashing anything here, I'm legitimately confused by the new expectations the world puts on boys now.  What belongs to "boys" and what belongs to "girls"? 
Bottom line for me as a parent of two boys, is that I don't want the world to raise them, but they do have to function in it, and it's a wierd place anymore.  I'm not going to pump the ways of the 50's or anything, that's not my goal at all....we're still struggling with things that should be easy to figure out, like EQUAL PAY FOR EQUAL WORK....how hard is that? 
I guess I'm just in a weird place...I'm not the bread winner...Kelli has always made more money, so that whole gender stereotype is out the window here...but I don't want to raise boys thinking they should "marry up" like their ol' dad did :)....but if you can....
It's just wierd the images you see portrayed of guys on TV or in ads or anywhere....we're always the bad guy, or the dumb oaf, or something....it's not okay to be dominate, aggressive, successful in popular media unless your a girl...then you're just awesome like Mia Hamm beating up on Michael Jordon (yeah right..still think that commercial was ridiculous).  Heard a quote...."If you belittle a woman, you have a fight and potential lawsuit on your hands....if you belittle a man, you have a Hallmark card in the making".    
What's the point?  I don't know, don't really have one, just want to make sure I raise my boys to be the best  boys ever I guess?  Parents have to think about everything before their kids get to point to where they need something, then your just ready for it...right?  Are we ever ready for it?  
As far as I go, I'm hoping it's not un-masculine to be on a "gluten free" diet, feel like less of a man..."want some pizza?"  "No, sorry, can't handle gluten"  Death by wheat...ridiculous.  I'd hate for my boys to think ol' dads got a weak gut, so I'm hoping an increase in energy and few trips to the camode will offset any feeling of loss from not pushing for more fried foods on the weekends.  
Eh, I guess it'll all work out if I just hang out with them, teach them stuff, tell them we're proud of them, that we love them....they're smart right?   I hope for their sake, that when they're my age....they can still eat pizza when they want, that's a big win right there.

1 comment:

  1. From my vantage point, being gluten-free for health reasons does NOT emasculate you at all! I hope that helps. As far as raising your kids, I am absolutely confident that you and Kelli are doing a terrific job, despite all the "weirdness" in this world (and it just gets weirder every day). A sound set of parents will go a long, long way to ensure that your kids do what is right for them. Thanks for the fun, thought-evoking post!

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